Lightning

Lightning bolts whiz across the sky
Like they’re trying to mirror my thoughts.
Thunder roars equally as loud
As my roar,
A roar I am using far too frequently.
Here I am again,
Swimming in my head again.
It was fun at first, 
And I still don’t want to stop,
But now I’m getting scared.
What if it’s not that I don’t want to stop,
But that I can’t stop?
The temperature of my soul burns,
As though it was just struck
By that lightning bolt
Whizzing across the sky
Because my head was just struck
By all these ecstatic frightening thoughts
Whizzing through my neurons.

Inhale

Inhale lightning
Exhale thunder
Fall steadily
The infinite descent

The vortex is forming
The storm is here
Feel the updraft
Take advantage
And take flight

Growing Weary

I’m growing weary
Of the ephemerality of stability.
It’s not fair–no nevermind;
Nothing is fair–it just plain
Old sucks

That I spends weeks, sometimes months
In an out-of-control manic state
Feeling God run through my veins
As my bank account gets wounded
And I unknowingly hurt myself
Over and over again,
Burning bridges like some
Kind of arsonist

Followed by weeks, maybe months
Of soul-crushing depression
And feeling that the world is just too much for me–
Or am I too much for it?

Then it eases
Oh so temporarily

Before the cycle repeats.

Fearful and Avoidant

Feeling wild and free
Feeling wide-eyed and please
Won’t you take my hand and
Let me in your band?
I thought we were together
But you didn’t call and say whether
You were too busy so I assume
You don’t want to be in the same room. 
Alone here I sit
Feeling lost: this is my exit.

Whatever May Come (Poetry by Sara)

The excitement hits me like
Flurries in a New Hampshire winter–
Unexpected, out of nowhere,
Short lasting, but could amount to
Either the greatest day,
The messiest of situations,
Or nothing at all.
That’s okay.
Let the flakes fall
And land where they may.